MY MARRIAGE TO ARCHITECTURE #3
(Admin's note : Third article of a series of articles on the same topic)
I woke up every morning, to please his family. Back to back submissions, presentation sheets, trophy works, manual drafting, all nighters, I worked hard to make a good impression, but the critical reviews just took a piece out of me every time i went through one. But nothing I would do could please them. They were high maintenance and not easily pleased. Eventually I got so lost trying to please them that I started forgetting about myself.
Architecture never stood up for me and that’s when I started thinking, holding on to this marriage was just not worth my time. It had been 3 semesters already and I was worried about the options a divorce would leave me with.
I complained a lot and Cried a lot to my parents. I went home whenever I could. I guess I was hoping to get reassurance and a reason to hold on. That’s when my father said “All marriages are difficult, And require adjustments “ and I felt bad, really bad! Now even my parents are not getting what I’m going through. As my complaining kept going on and on, they got fed up. They told me I could do anything that I wanted! Get a divorce if that’s what I’m trying to tell them.
And yet again the final decision was left to me. At times I was proud to be married to architecture. But is that enough reason to hold on? I don’t know what we had and what we will have. Everyone said we made a wonderful couple. But putting up with his family was unbearable to little insecure me. I was indecisive and broken and under appreciated.
Chitra
(Admin's note : Third article of a series of articles on the same topic)
(Written By Chitra V)
THE DECISION
It was the year 2011. I had completed my 12th
standard board exams and was awaiting the results. And I had my eyes on this young man,
Animation. Since I didn’t want to be an engineer or a doctor, I decided to tell my parents about him.
My parents weren’t exactly pleased by my choice as they thought Architecture would be a better
groom for me. So my father advised me not to rush the decision and take a year off to think it through. The condition was that,
If I still do not have a clear cut decision by the end of 2012, I were to prepare myself for an alliance with
Architecture.
I went out with Animation quite a lot in my one year off. He was different than
I had expected but very lovable nevertheless. We got to know each other quite a
lot and just like that one whole year
passed by, in the blink of an eye.
Me and animation had become the best of friends
but I wasn’t in Love. So I convinced myself that it was not meant to be and
agreed to go with my parents decision and I prepared myself for an arranged
marriage with Architecture.
And that is how me and Architecture
exchanged rings and took vows.
THE MARRIAGE
Architecture was Sophisticated, Charming
and Intelligent and like all intelligent men, he was a lot of work. As time
passed by he became more and more demanding and got me into thinking this
marriage was a really bad decision. Everything was always about him! I didn’t
have time for myself anymore.
THE NEW FAMILY
I woke up every morning, to please his family. Back to back submissions, presentation sheets, trophy works, manual drafting, all nighters, I worked hard to make a good impression, but the critical reviews just took a piece out of me every time i went through one. But nothing I would do could please them. They were high maintenance and not easily pleased. Eventually I got so lost trying to please them that I started forgetting about myself.
Architecture never stood up for me and that’s when I started thinking, holding on to this marriage was just not worth my time. It had been 3 semesters already and I was worried about the options a divorce would leave me with.
I complained a lot and Cried a lot to my parents. I went home whenever I could. I guess I was hoping to get reassurance and a reason to hold on. That’s when my father said “All marriages are difficult, And require adjustments “ and I felt bad, really bad! Now even my parents are not getting what I’m going through. As my complaining kept going on and on, they got fed up. They told me I could do anything that I wanted! Get a divorce if that’s what I’m trying to tell them.
And yet again the final decision was left to me. At times I was proud to be married to architecture. But is that enough reason to hold on? I don’t know what we had and what we will have. Everyone said we made a wonderful couple. But putting up with his family was unbearable to little insecure me. I was indecisive and broken and under appreciated.
Time passed by and after four long
semesters, I finally decided to take this marriage on my pace. I stopped trying
to please everyone, I stopped trying to be perfect, I stopped being so hard on
myself. As I started appreciating myself instead of seeking validation from
his family, I started feeling a whole lot better. I found my peace one step at a time and I learned how to be happy.
Two more semesters passed by, 3 years of marriage!
I’m still as confused, unsure and indecisive as I was. But now, a tad bit more hopeful that maybe when I wake up tomorrow, I would realise that I have always been in love with architecture.
Two more semesters passed by, 3 years of marriage!
I’m still as confused, unsure and indecisive as I was. But now, a tad bit more hopeful that maybe when I wake up tomorrow, I would realise that I have always been in love with architecture.
Still Waiting for my platinum day of Love.
Chitra
